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Script Doctor Eric

This week’s Logline Friday didn’t yield as many loglines as usual.  The ones submitted were generally good – many of you tweeted loglines that were oh, so close!  But they still had one or two things off.

The dip in submission numbers had me wondering a few things:

1. Is the game too difficult?

Coming up with a great logline is tough, especially since most of us are working to master screenwriting NOT logline writing.  I get it.

However, having a concise pitch of your story an important part of selling your screenplay, or just talking about your work with average folks.  To help, I’ve posted past logline winners.  Take a look at the winners, practice your pitch, and revise, revise, and, well, revise again!

2. Is the prize* not big enough?  

Nah, that can’t be it.  :)

3. Are screenwriters reluctant to resubmit loglines from past weeks?

Really, you can resubmit.  It’s fine.  However, you may want to take a good look at your logline, and perhaps revise it.  At least twice.

Alight, so who won this week?  Without further ado, the winner of Logline Friday for January 4, 2013 is…

John H!  John’s logline:

OFF THE MAP (Action/Comedy) – A whiz at navigating the internet must learn to navigate an all-new environment – the Great Outdoors – when hitmen pursue him through a remote wilderness.

This logline is a concise gem.  It’s a little bit  urban vs. rural, modern vs. primitive, and really has me wondering how my Google Maps skills would translate if I were thrown into a DELIVERANCE-type situation…

The only thing I don’t like about the logline is the “hitmen” aspect.  If I never read a script or watch another movie with hitmen in it, it will be too soon.

However, I AM a big fan of fish-out-of-water ideas, especially when it comes to comedy.  And this fits right in with a list of success after success that includes RUSH HOUR, TOMMY BOY, MEET THE PARENTS, HOT FUZZ, and the list goes on…and on…and….I think I see a post on this in the future…

Congrats to John (his blog – johnmichaelhenderson.blogspot.com) who wins notes on the first 10 pages of any script he wishes to send my way!

Hopefully he sends me this one, so I can see if all this time on the internet will help me survive in the post-apocalyptic, technology-free future that we’re inevitably headed towards.


(Not really.)




* The prize for winning Logline Friday, of course, is free script notes on the first 10 pages of your script!  There will be new prizes in 2013 as well, so stay tuned!

Related posts:

  1. Logline Friday Winner – The Claim